By the time you're reading this, I'm probably in the middle of my very first job interview, crawling and stuttering my way into the next word I'm going to say. Because I must admit, in contrast with the title, I'm NOT THAT professional.

When I got scheduled for this interview, the first thing that popped in my head is the question: "What is your biggest weakness?"

Well, I have a lot of weaknesses. I get weak over fatty and junk food, drinks full of sugar, really cute guys who turn out to be gay, coffee, the internet, etc.

But of course, I'm not going to answer those things on my job interview. So while I was showering before I went to bed, I asked myself: "What is my biggest weakness?"

I got so anxious over finding the answer before my big interview, then I found out the answer.

I get so anxious all the time.

I get anxious when I'm talking to my professors, when I'm reporting, when I pass my homework, when I'm in the middle of my very first job interview...

So the next thing I asked myself is: "How do I get over this?"

The best answer, right now, is to be professional about it. Getting over your weakness, I've learned, is the best way to practice professionalism. It takes time, of course. Being professional enough to not show your bosses that you're dying with nervousness inside, being professional enough to make it look like your OCD is normal, being professional enough to make dinuguan look like a decent office lunch. In everything you do, make it look and sound professional.

Because in our deepest selves, we will always make mistakes. We're not perfect, but we can be professional about it.

Does that sound professional enough?

Last week, I read an article written by Trishia Perez about a specific concept of love, or rather, like, that is called "rebound".

Like the author, I too have been a rebound. From the moment I read the article, I knew what she meant. "Rebound" is such an evil concept of love yet something that isn't new for us anymore. But what I liked about this article, though, is that it turned such a negative vibe into a positive one, because of the experience she shared. It was one thing to get over being a rebound, but a completely different thing to avoid making someone as his/her rebound.

I applaud the author for making "rebound" sound like a phase of life. Because it is. It's not just a status, or a label you can call yourself after a certain heartbreak or experience. It actually is something that you have to deal with, something you have to confront yourself with.

When I became a rebound, it was devastating. I questioned myself, my self esteem, my physical, mental and emotional competence, all summed up into one question: "Am I not good enough?" Because knowing that someone was just using you to get over someone else, apparently takes up a lot from you as a confident person. It makes you question a lot of things about yourself.

But in the end, what's important is that you know that it isn't you who's the problem. It's the other person. Because no one is better than anybody. Everyone of us is just the same, it just takes the right person to see that.

The case of 19 year old United States Marine Joseph Scott Pemberton has been  long time national issue since 2014, when Pemberton was said to have killed Jennifer Laude, a Filipino transwoman whom Pemberton did not know was transgender.

Looking at the facts and evidences, two condoms were found at the bathroom where Laude's body was found, but what it contains were negative of both Laude and Pemberton's DNA samples. This, I guess, was a plus for Pemberton since it could prove that no sexual intercourse were done. But then again an offer from the United States of giving Laude's family a huge amount of money just to lower Pemberton's charge, was just a plain disappointment.

Basically, even if the court had mase a decision, the case will still go on and on. Cases like murders and such will never really end, especially when victims like Laude are involved.

I'm not one for facts on laws and the country's constitutions, I hardly get those, so I'd rather not keep myself involved. But when I heard about this case, what really bothered me was the fact of how disappointing it must have been for Pemberton to anger him that much to make him kill Laude, just because of Laude being a transgender.

Up until now, I still don't get it. I understand that it must have been disappointing for Pemberton to know that Laude was a transgender, after making him believe that she was a woman. But disappointment up to the point where he killed her, that's the part I don't get.

Maybe there's a much deeper explanation for this. Perhaps an emotional and mental state that science and politics alone cannot answer. Perhaps a belief or a life option that cannot be dissected inside the courtroom, we'll never really know. For me, it all boils down again, to some people not being openly welcoming of the LGBT community. This isn't the first of so many cases of discrimination all because someone is gay, lesbian, or trans.

As someone who doesn't really classify someone according to gender, maybe I, too, am blind on the wider explanations on cases as such, and as much as I want to understand what must have been going on in Pemberton's head during that time, maybe it will be hard for me as well. A lot of people called Pemberton names such as "homophobic", "serial killer", and all other negative things, I'd like to believe that there's an acceptable explanation to this, no matter how bizarre. 

As much as it's fun to scroll through all your songs and enjoy a wide variety of genres to pick from, it could be hard at times too. When you're on the road or going jogging, and you're just really in the mood for some lively music, shuffling through all your songs, even the sad and slow ones, could be annoying. Organizing your favorite songs can be quite a convenience especially at times like this. Luckily for us, most smartphones today are giving us the luxury of getting to divide our songs into sections that we can pick from regardless of where we are, how much time we have, and what mood we're in for.

1. Go to Music




2. Go to the Playlists section on the top of your screen




3. Click "New Playlist"




4. Add a Title for your playlist.




5. Click Add Songs




6. Pick away!


After creating even just one, or a bunch of playlists on your phone, you'll really notice the difference it will make to your listening experience

Not so long ago, teleserye love teams were the mainstream picture in the heads of many Filipinos. The typical boy-meets-girl stories we see on TV were the closest thing most of us could witness of commercialized love teams. Romance were either a relevent or a totally non-existent issue in the country, despite the irony of Filipinos being "romantics". But things were suddenly taken on a different turn when a local TV Station introduced us to one of the best things that happened on Filipino TV: AlDub.

An unintentional chemistry between actor Alden Richards and internet celebrity Maine Mendoza, or also dubbed as "Yaya Dub" (see what I did there), many Filipinos witnessed the next best love team on National TV. Thus, the beginning of the AlDub Phenomenon.

Taking into account and creating parodies of the usual Filipino storylines like the leading lady suddenly being in the middle of an arranged marriage, or one of them being kidnapped for ransom, or when the lady's family doesn't approve of the man, AlDub just won the hearts of the masses. Together with GMA Network's Eat Bulaga family, the cast of the so-called Kalyeserye consisting of Wally Bayola, Paolo Balesteros and Jose Manalo just kept the story going on and on and never fails to leave the audience wanting more. After months of airing Eat Bulaga's Kalyeserye segment, the show resorted to going live through the "Ang Tamang Panahon" show held at the biggest arena in the country, and filling it with thousands of fans ready to witness more of AlDub.

A phenomenon as such is so rare in today's culture that when one suddenly falls into our hands, it's evident and we can't help but wonder how a mainstream and light project could spark the interest of hundreds of thousands. It's the impressive effort of the people running the Kalyeserye segment to keep the story going together with the hearts of the masses. Presenting an image of two people deeply in love with each other yet struggling with the challenge of seeing each other in person while still fighting for their love, urged the Filipinos to show their inner romantics.

And being the inner romantics that we are, we keep waiting for what's next for Alden and Yaya Dub whether we like to admit it or not. It's contagious, really. We either go from wanting to know what the chaos is all about, to being completely hooked on the entire idea. But in a nutshell, AlDub is today's representation of how our culture slowly created an image for Filipino romance. Light and heavy at the same time, full of values and has a message strong enough to keep on going even in the eyes of many.

Whenever I get the chance to introduce myself to anyone, I usually start off with the words, "I'm Nicole. I'm nineteen years old", then just stutter my way to the end. I started this uncanny routine of mine with, "I'm Nicole. I'm five years old", and 14 years later, here I am, still unbelievably clueless on how to describe myself at a time like this.

So I'll probably just start with the first thing that comes to my head. Oh, that's it. I love the color black.

I also love arguing my way on and on into justifying that black really is a color. I love indie alternative music, photos, and clothing. I love going to concerts. I love watching TV series. I love the idea of being a lawyer, but I hate prepping myself to actually being one. I love morning bike rides. I love food. I love reading books.

But should I ever be banned from loving these things, then I'll just love writing instead. Oh, wait. No, I don't just love writing. If there's a word more intense than love, then that's exactly how I feel about writing.

That's why at this point right now, I'm slowly realizing that I'm not even stuttering my way into writing about myself. Probably because I'm introducing myself to you in my natural habitat, writing.

So now that that's settled, I should probably let you dig in a little deeper.

I was diagnosed with  (and later on, got rid of) pyloric stenosis when I was just a week old. One week old me had to go under two operations, poor kid. I learned how to read and write at the age of two. I started reading encyclopedias when I was three. I have social anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder with number and colors. I'm overweight. I'm insecure about my physical appearance. I have a bruised knee. I have 5 keloids.

Having to live with these things for nineteen years makes it look normal from my perspective. I'm pretty content with it, and I couldn't imagine life without these flaws and weird fetishes. But since you're already nearing the end, I should probably ask you this: Does all of these sound normal? Or is it just me?